Norman, OK – When a glitch in the system at OG&E caused over one-third of the buildings on campus to lose power yesterday afternoon, many students were elated to find their classes cancelled for the day. Several students even reported getting out of a psychology test due to the blackout. However, one dick of a professor, Dr. Milford Crowder, refused to cancel his geography exam despite pleas from his students to reschedule.
“I can’t believe he made us take that test,” said Jennifer Dawsey, an Elementary Education junior. “We couldn’t even see the questions. In fact, I’m pretty sure I wasn’t even hitting the bubbles on my Scantron.”
Brenden Pellino, an Electrical Engineering senior, said the prick had the nerve to chastise him for using his phone as a flashlight.
“It was so dark I could barely even see my hand in front of me, but he smacked my hand and told me to leave the classroom when I tried to give myself some light,” said Pellino.
The stupid prat of an educator defended his actions to Sweet Snark staff upon questioning, saying that a complete lack of light in a windowless classroom is no reason to cancel a potentially career-determining map exam.
“Like I’m supposed to believe that some ‘convenient’ power cut is a good excuse for your lousy study habits,” said the absolute git. “If you couldn’t bother memorizing the capital city and GDP of Bhutan, that doesn’t mean you get a free pass just because you ‘can’t see.’ I expect nothing less than complete and total dedication in my classroom.”
“This is going to come up in student evaluations for sure,” said Dawsey. “Someone needs to bring this douche down.”
Other students agreed. We will continue to follow this story until these protests inevitably fail to accomplish anything because the old geezer has tenure.